Rating: NC-17
Summary: Kennedy makes a fateful wish to a vengeance demon, and the post-"Chosen" landscape is altered.
Author Notes: Thanks to Herself for her suggestions and encouragement on an early draft of this fic.
Story Notes: Post-"Chosen." The fifth story in the "This Will Be Our Year" Willow/Giles series.
Disclaimer: It's Joss's world - I'm just in love with it.

---
Kennedy's Wish
Gwynnega
---

Kennedy had dusted three vamps by ten p.m., but it didn't make her feel better. That pissed her off, because dusting vamps was pretty much at the top of her list of favorite things to do. (There were a few things that rivaled it, but she hadn't gotten lucky in awhile.) Just before she plunged the stake into the third vamp's heart, she yelled: "Are you enjoying your bachelor party?" and the vampire said, "Huh?" Then she dusted him.

She prowled the streets, looking for lucky number four, but her heart wasn't in it. So when she passed a bar, she went in. It was kind of a dive, but that suited her mood just fine. When the bartender asked her what she wanted, it just pissed her off, because she liked girly drinks with little umbrellas, but tonight those reminded her of her first date with She Who Was Getting Married Tomorrow. "Jack and Coke," she muttered. At least the guy put a maraschino cherry in her glass.

A couple of guys tried to hit on her, but she glared at them until they moved off. She, at any rate, wasn't going to switch teams at the drop of a hat.

It had been a miserable couple of months, ever since she'd found out they were getting married. Not that it had been a picnic being around them before. It had been sickening enough when she'd found out about them in L.A., but it was worse being in Cleveland with them. Sometimes she thought she ought to just cut out, go to some other city. But this was the Hellmouth, where the action was, and why should she let them chase her away? She didn't want to give Giles the satisfaction.

"Drowning your sorrows?" A woman slid onto the next bar stool.

"Is it that obvious?" Kennedy asked.

"To a practiced eye," the woman said. She was drop-dead gorgeous, in a sophisticated kind of way. Light brown waves of hair framed her heart-shaped face. She had a blue pendant that glowed between her breasts. She wore a classic red dress that accentuated her figure.

It would serve Willow right if she took this stunning woman home on her wedding eve. Not that Willow would care.

"Although," Kennedy added, "I'm feeling slightly less sorrowful now that you're here." Okay, lame, but it was the only thing she could think of to say.

"I'm glad," the woman said, and extended her hand. "My name's Sheila."

"I'm Kennedy." Sheila's hand was warm and forceful.

She ordered another Jack and Coke for Kennedy and a glass of red wine for herself. "Do you want to talk about it?" Sheila asked in a voice that was at once compassionate and deeply sexy.

Kennedy sipped her drink. "Oh, you know. Old girlfriend getting married. To a man. A man more than twice her age. Tomorrow."

"Ouch."

"And you know, it's not like we were even together that long, but later I found out that she got together with him like within weeks of her breaking up with me. And did she have to pick a guy? I mean, how humiliating can you get? At least if she'd gotten together with some really hot gal - like you, for instance." She tried to pull back from her sob story, figuring it wouldn't do her much good in landing this gorgeous creature - not that she could bring herself to care that much tonight.

But the gorgeous creature merely smiled, and didn't seem to hear her compliment. "And the man - you say he's much older than her?"

"God, he could so be her father. He could practically be her grandfather. But you know, I don't think it's really about him. She had this really special thing with her girlfriend Tara, and she died - this guy Warren shot her - and Willow kinda freaked. Okay, she totally freaked. She was still getting over it when I met her."

"Still," Sheila said, "it sounds as if this man took advantage of her fragile state."

Kennedy guffawed. "Wouldn't exactly call Willow fragile! But still, you may be right. The thing is, though, she never got over Tara - that must be why she couldn't really fall for me. You know what I wish, Sheila?"

Sheila arched her perfect brows slightly. "What, Kennedy?"

Kennedy took a big sip of Jack and Coke, sweet and scalding. "I wish Tara had never died. I wish that creep Warren had never shown up with a gun." With a shudder she remembered how Willow had turned into Warren, had swaggered into the Summers backyard, gun cocked. "I wish he'd never shot Tara. That way, I never would have gotten together with Willow, but I wouldn't have had my heart broken. And more importantly, Giles never would've gotten his hooks into her. That's what I wish."

Sheila raised her glass. Confused, Kennedy lifted hers. "Done," Sheila said with an aristocratic little smile, and clinked Kennedy's glass.

Kennedy laughed. "Yeah, it would be nice if it were that simple."

Sheila downed her wine. She plunked some bills on the bar and gracefully dismounted from her stool. "It was lovely talking with you, Kennedy."

"Aw, you going already? I'm sorry if I rambled on about my problems. I'd love to hear all about you."

"Maybe some other time," Sheila said. She leaned in and kissed Kennedy on the cheek. Then she turned and strode out.

Good going, Kennedy thought. That's the way to seduce the ladies - tell 'em about your shambles of a love life. She shook her head, then downed the rest of her drink.

She walked out of the bar, a bit unsteady on her feet. She'd only walked a block, when a vamp leaped out from an alley. He snarled at her. "Oh, good," Kennedy said, "you've made my night." Killing another vamp would be the perfect nightcap. She pulled a stake from her pocket - but the vamp easily knocked it from her hand. Jeez, she didn't think she was that drunk. The vamp punched her in the face, and she staggered back, then swung at him. Her fist connected with his jaw, but not with the force she'd expected. It merely glanced off him, and he grabbed her by the throat. What the hell? She flailed and kicked, but nothing seemed to have much effect. Was he a supervampire? But no, even in her tipsy condition, she knew that wasn't it. This was what it felt like before she got her Slayer powers. The vamp squeezed her throat, and she started to black out. The vamp leaned in, fangs bared -

The vamp exploded into dust, and Kennedy fell to the pavement. Someone peered down at her. "Kennedy? What are you doing out by yourself? You know it isn't safe." It was Buffy.

"Something's wrong," Kennedy mumbled, in between taking big gusts of air into her lungs. She scrambled to her feet. She felt shaky. "Something's wrong with me."

Buffy looked at her with narrowed eyes. "Are you drunk?"

"A little. But that's not it. My powers..."

"Will you get off that? It's really getting old."

Kennedy brushed the dust from her clothes. "But what are you doing here? I thought you were at the party."

She gave a weary sigh. "Oh, yeah, my life is one big party."

"But, I mean, I'm patrolling tonight - and I thought Vi was, too."

Buffy glared at her. "Vi? That isn't funny."

"Wasn't trying to be funny. Buffy, what about the party...the lameass bachelorette party?"

Buffy looked at her cluelessly. This was getting weird. "Who's getting married?"

"Willow and Giles, of course."

Buffy stared at her. "Okay, now I know you're on something."

"Come on, Buffy - you know Willow's marrying Giles tomorrow! I'm not pleased about it, but it's a fact."

Buffy gave a laugh. "I think Tara will have something to say about that."

Kennedy felt dizzy, and it wasn't from the booze or the near strangulation. "Tara?" she whispered. Oh god, what was happening? "Buffy, I don't feel so good." She was hyperventilating, and would've hit the pavement if Buffy hadn't grabbed her.

"Kennedy, what is the matter with you? Are you sick?"

"It's not supposed to be like this. My powers, and Tara...I mean, if Willow and Giles aren't getting hitched, that's good, but..."

Just then there were running footsteps. "Buffy! What's keeping you?" It was Spike. Kennedy squinted at him, pale but not dead pale under the streetlights. Okay, whatever was going on, Spike was still here and he was still human.

"What's the matter with Kennedy?" asked Chao-Ahn. What was Chao-Ahn doing in Cleveland? And suddenly her English was pretty good.

"We got jumped by five vampires a few blocks away," Spike said. "Chao-Ahn staked four and I got one."

"Chao-Ahn still has her Slayer powers," Kennedy murmured.

Now they all looked at her like she was nuts. "And?" Spike asked.

"Yes," Buffy said, "me and Chao-Ahn are the Slayers. And we have work to do...real work, not the kind that involves babysitting you and your apparent problem with alcohol."

"You and Chao-Ahn are the only Slayers?" Kennedy felt like the earth was about to open up and swallow her, and not in a Hellmouthy kind of way. "But this is a nightmare..."

"Will you give that a rest?" Spike asked. "Everyone knows the only reason you're hanging around Cleveland is you're hoping Buffy or Chao-Ahn will kick it and you'll get called."

"It isn't my fault I got called when Faith died," Chao-Ahn said quietly. "I never asked for this. Fine with me if you'd gotten the Slayer powers instead, Kennedy."

Kennedy tried to slow her breathing. Okay, Kennedy, figure this out. I was drinking in the bar, I was talking to Sheila, I went outside and my powers were gone...

And then it hit her. Sheila. That pendant around her neck.

"Oh, shit," she said. How could she have been so stupid? She'd spent all that time with Anya, and Willow had told her stories about Anyanka and all that stuff, and still she hadn't figured out Sheila was a vengeance demon. She'd made a wish to a vengeance demon. Well, she'd been drunk...not really a good enough excuse for altering the fabric of reality.

Still, Willow and Giles weren't getting married, and that was something. No, not when Faith was dead, and she'd lost her Slayer powers.

"Come on," Buffy said, "let's walk. I'm taking you home."

God, where did she even live now? "I know this is going to sound crazy," Kennedy said, "but tell me, who's here - from Sunnydale, I mean?"

"Do you have some kind of amnesia?" Buffy asked.

"Maybe. I've been feeling strange since I left that bar."

"That's called getting soused," said Spike.

In this reality, Buffy still drove the same little Toyota. Buffy and Spike got in front, she and Chao-Ahn in back. "Okay," Buffy said, turning the key in the ignition. "Aside from those of us in this car, Willow and Tara are in Cleveland, and Giles."

"That's all? What about...all the other girls?"

Spike turned around and gave her a disdainful look. "Must have amnesia, to ask a question like that. They're all dead, of course. Died in Sunnydale, right before I did."

"And Xander, and - "

"You had better have amnesia," Buffy said through clenched teeth. "I told you, it's just us, Willow and Tara, and Giles."

Kennedy felt like Buffy had just punched her in the stomach. All of them dead? All the girls who'd been Potentials with her, Xander, Dawn, Faith, Wood, Andrew? Or had all of them even been in the battle in this reality? They were dead because of her.

"God, I'm sorry," Kennedy said. "I'm sorry, I didn't know..."

Or maybe she was crazy. That was a distinct possibility, given the way everyone was reacting to her every word. Or maybe someone had drugged her drink, and she was hallucinating.

Buffy pulled over with a squeal of brakes. Kennedy didn't want to let on that she didn't know where she lived. She turned to Chao-Ahn. "Could you help me?"

"Get some rest," Buffy said. "Sleep it off. Hopefully whatever this is will have dissipated by morning. If not, we'll talk to Giles, see if something mystically weird's going on." Buffy sounded kind all of a sudden, and Kennedy felt tears starting - but she forced them back.

Kennedy found some keys in her pocket and managed to get into her apartment building on the third try - then Chao-Ahn led her to her unit, and with a little more trial and error, she got inside.

Kennedy closed the door and looked around her. It was a smaller, dirtier apartment than the one in her reality, but she didn't want to get too used to it. She sat on the edge of the bed. Buffy was right - she should talk to Giles. He could help her reverse the wish. She knew Anya had reversed a couple of wishes, so it was possible. Did it have something to do with her pendant? She couldn't remember - she hadn't listened all that closely to the stories about Anya.

She dialed directory assistance. Giles was listed.

When he picked up the phone, he sounded like she'd woken him up. "Kennedy - why are you calling so late?"

"Giles, I need your help." God, how galling was that? Pleading to the guy she couldn't stand. Though, of course, in this reality he'd never touched Willow, as far as she knew. She shouldn't hold this Giles responsible for what had happened in her reality - but this was getting way too confusing.

"Is it urgent, or can it wait until morning?" She heard him yawn.

"Giles, I made a wish to a vengeance demon tonight! I didn't know she was until it was too late, and now everything's changed!" She fought the urge to burst into sobs.

He was silent a moment. "I'd think that you would know better, Kennedy." Oh, yeah, there was the Giles she knew and loathed. "But you're saying some vengeance has been exacted? Upon whom?"

"No, it's not like that. People are dead who shouldn't be, and I don't even know what else has happened. And my powers are gone."

He gave a sigh. "Do we have to talk about the Slayer powers yet again?"

Clearly she'd been in brat mode when it came to the business of the Slayer powers. "Giles, please come over. We need to fix this. It's really serious."

When she let him in, she was surprised at how different he looked. Older, somehow. Not that he was young in her reality - but he'd been so happy, damn him. He was always grinning stupidly, just beaming away. And, of course, beaming most particularly at Willow.

But now he seemed...heavy, old. This was what she'd wished for - for him never to have gotten his paws on Willow. Yet looking at him now, she was almost sorry.

They sat at her small kitchen table. "In my reality, I'm a Slayer," she said. "No, don't look at me like that. There was this spell that Willow did with the scythe. It was beautiful - it turned her hair white. It shared the Slayer powers with all the potential Slayers, and all the girls who'd ever be called in the future."

He leaned toward her, eyes fixed on her. "Tara tried that spell, of course. She's a fairly advanced witch, but sadly, her skills were not up to the task. If Willow had done it...but you say Willow did the spell? It turned her hair white?"

"Like a total reversal of that whole black hair thing." Giles was giving her that You're crazy look that was starting to feel familiar. But of course, Willow had never done the black hair thing in his reality - Tara had never died, and Willow had never gone off the deep end. "The point is, in my reality, the Potentials became Slayers, and most of us lived. And Xander lived, and Dawn, and Faith, and Wood, and Andrew."

"Who?"

"You know, Andrew."

Giles shook his head. "But you say that Dawn, and Xander - "

"Andrew. One of the three nerds. You know, Warren and Jonathan and Andrew."

"Oh, him. The three of them are still in prison, as far as I'm aware. I'm not sure where they've been incarcerated since their trial."

"The three of them..." Right, Warren hadn't killed Tara, Willow hadn't killed Warren or tried to kill Jonathan or Andrew. Andrew had been in jail so the First hadn't targeted him. Well, wherever he was, at least Andrew wasn't dead.

"What about Anya?" Giles asked. "Did she survive the final battle?"

"No, she died, I'm sorry. But you're saying the spell didn't work in this reality? How did anyone survive the Ubervamps? How did I survive?"

Giles removed his glasses and cleaned them with a grim look. "If it hadn't been for Spike and the amulet, we all would have perished." He put his glasses back on and gazed at her intently. "And why should I believe any of this? Perhaps you're hallucinating. There are certain demons that produce a venom that can cause - "

"No, I haven't been injected by any demon venom. I just made a really stupid wish, all because I was pissed off that you and Willow..." She froze.

"That I and Willow what?"

God, she so did not want this Giles to know. But if she was going to get her powers back and save her friends' lives, she'd have to. "Okay, in my reality, Willow and I dated for awhile. She dumped me right after Sunnydale went into the crater, and then the two of you hooked up."

Incredulous didn't even begin to describe the look on Giles's face. "You and Willow...I and Willow?"

"Oh yeah," Kennedy said. "When I made the wish, the two of you were about to get married, like tomorrow. You were having your bachelor party."

Was Giles actually blushing? "Kennedy, I assure you, I've never had any such thoughts or feelings about her. I've known her since she was a young girl."

"Save it. You two were doing it like bunnies. You have been for a year."

"That's absurd. Besides, Willow is - "

"Gay. Yes, that's what I thought, too." At least in this reality, Willow still was gay, or acting like it.

"It's clear that Willow and Tara love each other very much."

"But you don't understand, Tara's not supposed to be here. She died, and Willow went all magically evil, and you took her away to England - "

"I took her to England?"

"You, you know, rehabilitated her, and you told her she couldn't turn her back on the magic. That it wasn't an addiction like she'd thought."

"That it was a responsibility..." Giles murmured, and she could tell he had begun to believe her. "I've told Willow and Tara for a long time that I didn't believe quitting the magicks outright was the safest option. I've long believed that she could lose control under certain circumstances. But I've never told you any of this."

"You believe me, right? You have to believe me. We have to put this right."

As if to himself, Giles said, "Yes, we must put this right." Then a look of horror crossed his face. "Tara. This will kill Tara."

"Giles, she's already dead. She's been dead a long time."

***

Giles barely slept that night. He and Kennedy were up for hours, while he grilled her about the demon she claimed to have made a wish to, about the reality she said she'd come from. At first he'd thought she might have taken leave of her senses, but eventually he came to believe her story.

Kennedy wanted him to summon the demon then and there so they could, as he'd explained, destroy her pendant and put things back the way they'd been before - but he told her they had to wait, he had to talk to Tara. He wasn't going to play God with her life. He told Kennedy to get some sleep, that he'd call her when he'd spoken to Tara and they'd summon the demon.

Once he was home, it occurred to him he ought to call Buffy, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to do it. The events of the previous year had taken their toll on her. She blamed herself for the deaths of her sister, her friends and the Potentials. She had been inconsolable for months, until Spike reappeared - then she seemed able to live on. But Giles knew what it would do to her, to know that things could be different, but that the difference would be bought with Tara's death. He didn't want to put that responsibility on her, on top of all her other seemingly endless responsibilities.

He lay awake most of the night, turning everything around in his mind. He barely allowed himself to think about that other thing Kennedy had said. It was preposterous, it was obscene. He'd known Willow since she was a child. It had been a long time since he had been involved with anyone, and he'd more or less resigned himself that that part of his life was over. In some ways he'd never recovered from the destruction of the Council. He'd felt himself grow closer to death than life on that day, and that had never really changed.

But towards morning, the images started to come - half-dreamed, half-imagined. You did it like bunnies, Kennedy had said, and he saw it all. Willow lay naked beneath him as he moved inside her. She whispered his name. He held her in his arms. He kissed her.

Giles fully awakened with a gasp. She was his friend, she trusted him. Such fantasies made no sense in this reality, and precious little sense in any other.

In the morning he showered, and shaved his haggard face. Then he dialed their number.

"Hello?" It was she, and everything stopped for a moment.

"Hello, Willow," he said in a small voice. In the other reality, they were getting married today.

"Giles...a little early for a Saturday, isn't it? What's up?" In the background he heard Tara mumbling groggily. Sleepy Tara, who died two years ago. Giles shut his eyes tight, as if he could make all this go away.

"I'm sorry if I woke you. Might I come over this morning? There's something I need to discuss with Tara."

"With Tara? Oh, you mean something about magicks?" Her voice grew wistful. "Sure, that's fine. We're here - I was just going to do some laundry later. Tara doesn't have to work today." Tara worked at a local new age bookshop. Tara had been dead for two years.

By the time he stood at their apartment door, his heart was racing. Now that he was about to see Willow, that other thing Kennedy had said loomed large. He knew it was a minor thing, compared to the death of Tara, the life of Dawn and Xander and the others - but it boggled his mind. What's more, it boggled his heart.

When she opened the door, he held his breath. Her hair was damp, and she wore a pink T-shirt and jeans. Her feet were bare. She smiled, and a sweet ache started up in him. "Morning, Giles." How lovely she was. Had he really not noticed that before? She let him in. "Tara's still sort of pulling herself together. She'll be out soon."

Her red hair left sunspots in his vision. The upturned corners of her mouth seemed to catch in his chest. Of course, he thought. How had it escaped him, that he could love Willow? If he had any remaining doubts that Kennedy had told him the truth, they vanished now. He'd always loved Willow, of course, as a friend, as a young friend, but this...

He ducked his head. He felt like a dirty old man. And it was wrong to feel this way, because of Tara.

"Everything okay, Giles?"

"What?"

She peered at him. "You're looking at me kinda funny."

He'd never noticed how green her eyes were. "Sorry...I'm just tired. Didn't sleep well last night."

She screwed up her face into a comically weary expression. "The world's not ending again, is it? Because I'd really rather not."

"No," he said, "the world isn't ending." The world is merely spinning off its axis, he thought.

She grinned. "Well, good. Can I get you something? Some tea, maybe?"

"That would be lovely." He followed her into their bright little kitchen.

She put the kettle on, then opened the refrigerator and pulled out a loaf of bread. "Toast?"

"Thank you." Giles wondered how he had fallen in love with Willow in the other reality. Had it been gradual, or had he simply fallen, hard and fast, the way he slipped now into something that felt strangely familiar, as if it had been just below the surface for years. He was almost certain it had been the latter - that one day he had simply looked at her and seen her, as he saw her now, bringing butter and marmalade to the kitchen table where he sat.

She wore a cheerful morning face as she put the toast on plates, brought over cups and teabags, a bowl of sugar. "Sorry, Giles," she said, "all I've got is bag tea."

"It's fine," he said, and smiled at her. Without really meaning to, he said, "You seem happy, Willow. Are you happy?"

She raised her eyebrows. "Gee, you're a little philosophical for first thing in the morning. I don't think you've ever asked me a thing like that, in all the years we've known each other." She sat at the table and dunked her teabag a few times. "You really want an answer?"

He nodded.

"Life's pretty good. I mean, Tara and I are together, and that's the main thing."

"Of course." Giles busied himself spreading marmalade on his toast.

"And maybe my job doesn't fulfill me in every way...but I've always liked computers. And hey, I'm making good money, so maybe Tara and I can move into a bigger place. Though I like this apartment - it's homey."

Giles had thought it a waste when Willow took the job handling computer security issues for a major company. Not that she wasn't a natural at it - but he knew she had the potential for so much more. "And the magic?" he asked. "Do you miss the magic?"

Her face clouded. "I wish you wouldn't always bring that up, Giles."

He wanted to tell her that she'd done the spell with the scythe and it had worked, she'd changed the world so much for the better, she'd learned to use her power wisely. Instead he said, "I know. I'm sorry."

"I'm proud of Tara, of how advanced she's become. So we're a one-wicca household, and that's just fine with me. It really is." She plopped marmalade on her toast with a defensive air.

Tara came in the room and smiled. A jolt of grief went through him. "Good morning, Giles," she said, with that serene look she almost always wore. Then she saw his face, and her smile faded.

Willow picked up her plate and cup. "I'll leave you two to talk the magicks," she said. I've upset her, Giles thought with a pang. Then it occurred to him that this was nothing compared to what was coming.

"Will, you don't have to..." Tara said.

"No," Willow said, "it's perfectly fine." She hurried out.

Tara sat opposite Giles and gazed at him with large clear eyes. God, it wasn't fair. "Something's wrong?" she asked.

"Yes," he whispered. Then he forced his voice to sound steady. "Tara, I don't know how to tell you this..."

"Just say it."

He pushed aside his plate and cup, the toast and tea untouched. "Last night I found out...our reality has been altered. Some of us who are dead are actually meant to be alive, while others..."

Tara reached across the table and put her hand on Giles's arm with a firm grip. "I'm not supposed to be here, am I?"

Giles took a deep breath. "How did you know?"

Her face contorted, and her eyes filled with tears. For a moment she couldn't speak.

"Tara, I'm so very sorry."

A tear spilled down her cheek, but she regained her composure. "I've known for a long time. I'd hoped I was wrong. It started two years ago...bit by bit, I just knew I was out of place."

"It was two years ago that you died. Last night Kennedy made a wish to a vengeance demon. She wished you had never been killed." Giles told her how, in the other reality, Willow did the spell with the scythe.

"So you were right all along, Giles. And I was wrong - Willow and I were wrong - to think she couldn't handle the magic. If only we'd listened to you, we could've saved the others."

"Don't," he said. "That's very easy to say now, but I might easily have been wrong."

Tara's eyes brightened. "But now we can save the others, can't we? We can save Dawn, and Xander, and..."

Giles took her hand and squeezed it. "We can. But you know what that means."

She nodded, and another tear rolled down her face. "I know. And I don't want to die. But it's wrong for me to be here. I can't be here at their expense." She lowered her voice, and held his hand tightly. "But Willow...what will happen to her when I'm gone? I don't want to leave her."

He felt as if he were drowning. "There's something else Kennedy told me. Apparently...in the other reality..." He couldn't look her in the eye. "Willow and I are to be married."

Tara's mouth hung open. "Oh," she said. "Oh."

"Believe me, I was as shocked as you when she told me."

Then she actually smiled slightly - a smile of understanding, of compassion. "You were shocked," she said, "but not surprised?"

Slowly he nodded. "I'd think you might hate me. I'm going to benefit from your death."

She shook her head. "No, Giles! This isn't your fault. I'm glad she won't be alone, that she'll have someone who loves her."

Now his eyes were wet. "Tara...maybe there's another way, another solution we haven't thought of."

"There's no other way. The vengeance spell has to be broken. But first, I need to tell Willow."

"I have reason to believe she may begin to abuse the magicks, to try to stop this."

"I don't think she'd do that," Tara said, but she sounded uncertain.

He lowered his voice. "Tara, when you died, she killed your murderer. Then she tried to destroy the world."

"You really are full of surprises today, aren't you?" She looked dazed. "But Giles, that was two years ago. She hasn't done any spells for over two years."

Just then, Willow walked in. "You two are talking about me?" she asked. "Giles, why are you suddenly going on about me and magic?" She saw their faces. "Oh god, what's wrong?"

"Willow..." Tara said. She stood and clasped Willow in her arms. Giles wished he could disappear - that he could disappear instead of Tara.

Willow pulled back slightly. "Tara, sweetie, what's the matter?" She looked over Tara's shoulder at Giles. "Giles, what's going on?"

"I think you should sit down," Giles said.

"Oh god," Willow said, "Giles, you said the world wasn't ending!"

"The world isn't ending, Will," Tara said. "Not for you."

"What does that mean?"

They told her about how Tara died, about Kennedy's wish, about the spell and how Xander and Dawn and the others survived. Neither of them mentioned Giles and Willow being together.

"Xander..." Willow murmured, and she started to cry. "Dawnie..." Then her eyes flashed. "No, I'm not going to trade Tara for them. No way. I miss them, I miss them every day, but I need her. She's my everything." Willow stared from Tara to Giles. "You've both gone crazy. You're crazy if you think I'm going to go along with this!" Her eyes grew more and more wild.

"Willow..." Tara soothed.

"No. And you!" Willow confronted Giles. "I let you into our home, I made you toast and tea, and you were here to talk about killing Tara! You can't take her away from me!"

Giles put his head in his hands. But no, he couldn't fall apart. He looked at Willow. "I'm so sorry, Willow. If there were another way..."

"There is. Get the hell out!" Her voice rose to a shriek. Then something occurred to her - her eyes widened. "No, on second thought, you can't leave. I can't let you find that vengeance demon."

Giles stood, but with a wave of her hand, Willow forced him back into his chair.

"And so it begins," Giles said.

"Willow, please don't," Tara said. "You have to let Giles do this."

"I do not have to," Willow muttered through clenched teeth. She turned to Giles. "Are you happy now? I'm using magic."

"Not like this," he said softly. He wanted to shake her - but also he wanted to hold her, to comfort her. Not his job, not in this reality. "I know you may find this difficult to believe," he said, "but you're not alone in the other reality. You have someone who loves you very much."

"According to Kennedy?" Willow jeered. "Since when are we basing our lives on Kennedy? I could never love anyone the way I love Tara."

And Giles believed that. It amazed him how much it hurt to hear her say those words.

"I believe you will love again, Willow," Tara said, and she locked eyes with Giles for a moment. "It's what I want for you."

"What about what I want?" Willow shouted. "And when will you quit being Saint Tara? I'm not going to let you sacrifice yourself!"

"Don't you understand," Tara said, her voice rising at last, "the only reason I'm alive is because something evil made it happen. I've alive at the expense of people I care about, people I couldn't save. But now I can."

Willow huddled in her chair and wept. "No, there must be another way. At least, we don't have to do this right now. Can't we wait a few days, or a week, or a month? And anyway, what's wrong with reality being altered? Those monks made Dawn - they altered reality, they gave us new memories, and we didn't try to get rid of her. We protected her!"

"It's not the same thing, Will," Tara said.

"I don't care." Willow had a new, dangerous resolve in her eyes. "Giles, I can't let you break the spell. I'll summon D'Hoffryn."

"I don't believe you'd really do that," Tara said. "And anyway, you don't have his talisman anymore - it's at the bottom of Sunnydale Crater with everything else."

"I remember the chant that summons him. I'll tell him what you're trying to do, and he'll stop you."

"No," Tara said. "I won't let you."

"No," Giles said, "this is too awful. I won't do it, I won't find the demon. What's done is done, Tara - you should live, be happy."

Willow's face lit up. "Giles, thank you!"

"No," Tara said, "I need you to do this, Giles. You know it's wrong to leave things like this."

Giles made himself get up. He walked out the kitchen door. He heard running footsteps. He turned - Willow hurried toward him, followed by Tara.

"Can't let you do that," Willow said. Her eyes were darkening, turning black. When he neared the front door, she flung her arms out. He almost wished she would kill him - but before the energy could hit him, Tara leaped in front of him. She went flying, and hit the ground.

"Tara!" Willow cried, and knelt by her side.

Tara looked merely stunned. "I'm okay," she said.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Willow whimpered. "I didn't mean..."

Tara put her arms around Willow, and looked up at Giles. "Go now," she said.

"Are you sure?" Giles whispered. Tara nodded. "Goodbye, Tara," Giles said. He started to cry. "Willow, I'm so very sorry..."

But Willow took no notice of him. She huddled crying in Tara's arms.

"Goodbye, Giles," Tara said. "I know you'll do what needs to be done." She nodded at him.

Stricken, he watched them. Tara murmured, "It's all right, I'll always love you..."

"I'm nothing without you," Willow sobbed. "It's all nothing without you, Tara."

"Not true," Tara said, stroking her hair. "That's not true."

He turned and walked out of their little apartment, never to return.

Yes, Giles thought, as he drove to Kennedy's apartment, that's what I do: what needs to be done, for the greater good. His life was reduced to duty, and he would do what must be done, heartlessly. But all he felt was the breaking of his heart. It broke, and then it turned to stone.

***

"So how do we summon Sheila?" Kennedy asked. "We don't know her real name. Maybe we should go back to that bar where I made the wish - maybe it's her regular hangout." Kennedy paced her living room in a black tank top and jeans. Giles wished she would sit still. Then again, this lumpy sofa of hers couldn't have been less comfortable. Unlike Willow and Tara's airy flat, Kennedy's apartment was hot and stuffy, even with the window open, and the fan that was running on the living room floor didn't do much to move the air around. Once Giles started burning the herbs necessary for the ritual, it would only get stuffier.

"This demon could be anywhere in this world," Giles said, wiping the sweat from his forehead, "and a number of other worlds as well. She found you because you were angry and hurt. Your pain was like a homing beacon to a vengeance demon."

Kennedy looked almost apologetic. "Well, gee - a woman scorned and all that. But how to do we find her?"

"From what you say, it sounds as if this demon was seeking vengeance against me in particular - which is to say, vengeance against me as a man, as opposed to vengeance against Willow, although she might be perceived to have wronged you as well." He took the herbs from their plastic bags and dropped them in the gold chalice he'd put on the living room table.

"Your point being?"

"Punishing men - that was Anyanka's modus operandi."

"But Anya's dead, in both realities."

"Perhaps this vengeance demon is her replacement. Or perhaps she regards herself as working in Anyanka's tradition. After all, Anyanka was a legendary vengeance demon for over a thousand years."

Kennedy stopped pacing. "You mean Sheila's like an Elvis impersonator?"

Giles rolled his eyes. "What I'm suggesting is that the demon has taken Anyanka's name."

"Isn't that like plagiarism?"

"Well, it's worth a try." Giles lit the herbs in the chalice as he recited the spell: "Anyanka, I beseech thee. In the name of all women scorned, come before me." It was strange calling on Anya's demon name. For a moment he thought it was poor, dead Anya who would appear, her hair dyed some new color.

Giles and Kennedy waited tensely. Nothing happened - except that the chalice smoked profusely, and Kennedy began to cough and fan the air.

"Great," Kennedy said. "There goes that theory."

"I just have a feeling..." Giles said. "You say she called herself Sheila?" He dumped a few more herbs into the chalice, and tried again: "Sh'Anyanka, I beseech thee. In the name of all women scorned, come before me."

"Shanyanka?" Kennedy asked. She put her hands on her hips. "You've got to be kidding. That is the lamest thing I've ever..." Just then, there was something like a thunderclap, and the demon appeared. She wore a black dress that showed off her hourglass figure, and high heels, but her face was a mass of veins. "Ugh," Kennedy said, "I must say, your other look was much sexier."

"Kennedy," Sh'Anyanka said in a gravelly voice, "lovely to see you again. You have the man in question with you, I see. Do you wish to wreak further vengeance upon him? Taking away his lady love wasn't enough?"

"Look, you took away my powers - that wasn't part of my wish!"

"Not to mention killing our friends," Giles added. Kennedy really was quite annoying.

"Right," Kennedy said, "and you need to take the wish back!"

Sh'Anyanka turned to Giles. "You're quite the man, Mr. Giles. Killing the girl's lover so you can have her all to yourself!"

"I'd lay down my life if I could spare them this," Giles said.

The demon smiled - not a pretty sight. "That can be arranged," she said, and her hand shot out. She squeezed Giles's throat, and he gasped. Kennedy leaped onto her back and got her arms around Sh'Anyanka's neck. The demon released him. "Giles, get the pendant!" she yelled.

But before Giles could attack, the demon threw Kennedy off. "Ungrateful little bitch!" Sh'Anyanka cried, grabbed her arm and tossed her across the room. Kennedy hit her head against the wall with a loud crack and slumped to the floor. Giles ran to her and felt for a pulse. She was dead.

He turned toward the demon. "Now you're going to break the spell."

She smirked. "And why would I do that? I like this reality much better, without all those little Slayers running around."

He stared at her. "Did you know all this would happen?"

"Actually, no - I merely sought to punish you. But the fringe benefits have been rather staggering, wouldn't you agree? And if you think I'm going to take any of that back, you're as deluded as you are selfish and lecherous."

"Very well," he said, advancing on her. "I'll break the spell myself."

"How do you propose to do that? You don't have any special powers."

"You have no idea who you're dealing with." He threw himself on her and tore the necklace from her throat, then backhanded her. She staggered on her high heels and toppled over.

"You give me my pendant," Sh'Anyanka croaked, and tried to scramble to her feet. Giles kicked her in the head. He strode to the far end of the room.

"If you give me my pendant back, I'll make a deal with you. You can have the girl. Her lover will live. All your friends will live. There'll be Slayers running all over the place." She tried to get up, but put her hand to head with a grimace. "Plus I'll give you riches, beyond your wildest dreams. And I'll...I'll increase your penis size. Just don't destroy my pendant! Please, I'm new at this, and that would be too embarrassing - I name myself after Anyanka, and the same thing happens to me..."

Giles threw the necklace to the floor. He raised his foot.

"No!" the demon cried.

He expected no reward in the other reality for this - no loving wife. He didn't think he'd know what to do with a loving wife. He was turning to stone. Closer to death than to life, he would do what must be done. He brought his heel down on the pendant.

***

"I wish he'd never shot Tara," Kennedy said. "That way, I never would have gotten together with Willow, but I wouldn't have had my heart broken. And more importantly, Giles never would've gotten his hooks into her. That's what I wish."

"Done," Sheila said, and clinked Kennedy's glass.

Kennedy laughed. "Yeah, it would be nice if it were that simple."

Sheila glanced downward and gave a start. Her hand flew to her chest.

"You know what else I wish?" Kennedy said. "I wish Giles's dick would vanish. Or maybe that his dick would shrink to the size of a peanut. I bet Willow wouldn't marry him then." She sighed. "Then again, I never knew she was so into penises."

But Sheila didn't seem to be listening. She seemed rather agitated. "I must be going," she said, "I seem to have misplaced something..." She jumped off the bar stool and hurried out.

Good going, Kennedy thought - you ran her off with your sob story and penis talk. So much for a little hot sex to take the edge off those impending nuptials...oh, fuck it. She downed her drink and left the bar. She'd walked less than a block when a vamp jumped her.

"Oh, good," Kennedy said, "you've made my night." She pulled a stake from her pocket. He tried to knock it from her hand, but her grip was too firm. "To the happy couple!" she yelled, and plunged the stake into the vampire's heart.

***

Giles got home from his bachelor party and walked into the darkened bedroom. "Giles," Willow said, "I'm awake."

He stripped to his shorts and climbed into bed. He kissed her.

"You taste like whiskey," she said.

"I do indeed." He lay on his back, and she snuggled against him.

"How was your party? Mine was fun. We ate chocolate, and they gave me presents. Some of them were wearable presents, for the honeymoon. I think you'll like them."

"Be still my heart..." he murmured. It was hard to believe that in a couple of days they'd be in Paris, a married couple on their honeymoon.

"So tell me about your party. Xander promised me there'd be no strippers."

"None whatsoever. We drank Scotch and watched films with surgically enhanced women in them."

"You watched porn?"

"Well, mostly Andrew watched. He insisted it was traditional for a bachelor party."

"I suppose he has a point. But surgically enhanced women...I always thought natural breasts were much sexier."

Giles cupped her breasts and sighed contentedly. "I couldn't agree more." Then he asked a question he probably wouldn't have if he hadn't been a bit inebriated. "Do you miss them?"

"Miss what?"

"Breasts," he said.

"Well, as you just demonstrated, I do have two of them." She paused. "Oh, you mean, do I miss being with women?"

"Do you?" He reflected that this was a hell of a conversation to be having with your fiance the night before your wedding - but he might as well know.

She hugged him tighter. "I'll always miss Tara, because I loved her, but I don't miss women in general, any more than I lust after men in general. It's you, Giles. Your body." She rubbed and nuzzled his chest. "You have such a nice body."

"Do I?" He smiled in the dark.

"You're so...substantial. I'm really kind of fixated on your body." She wriggled around him, bestowing kisses and caresses. It felt wonderful, although the Scotch had made him rather sleepy and lethargic.

"You're energetic tonight," he said.

"Maybe it's all that chocolate I ate. But I think it's more that I'm excited about the wedding - maybe too excited to sleep."

"Nervous?"

"No - I feel like a kid the night before Christmas. Or so I've always heard - what with being a Hanukkah kid."

He hugged her to him. "Xander made me nervous tonight. He's convinced some demon's going to crash the ceremony. He kept conferring with Spike about how much weaponry to bring to the wedding."

"Oh god, I thought my mom being at the wedding was the most stress I'd have to deal with!"

"I think I'd prefer to battle a few demons than have an extended conversation with your mother." Actually, the more he thought about it, the more he was certain this was the case.

"But no, no demon wedding crashers. Anyone who tries to wreck this wedding's gonna have to deal with one cranky witch." Giles noticed that her hands had just gone cold and clammy. "Giles, you don't think Xander's right, do you?"

He squeezed her hands in his own, then kissed them. "I think Xander's projecting from his own wedding disaster. But I say we're not going to have any disasters tomorrow. Nothing's going to keep me from marrying you."

"Really?" She kissed his mouth. "I believe you, oh whiskey-breathed beloved."

He chuckled. "Now, let me see what I can do to relax you." He kissed her neck and heard her sharp intake of breath. He stroked her breasts, her stiffening nipples through her sleep shirt. He slid a hand between her legs. Willow moaned and reached for his cock.

"Giles..." He loved his name on her lips, her greedy hands (now warm again), her wetness, always so eager for him. He loved her sweet soul. He was truly a fortunate man.

Let the demons try to stop us, he thought as he entered her. Just let them try.

(The next day, to Xander's surprise, the wedding went off without a hitch.)

---
The End
Email author
This Will Be Our Year series page
Back